@Hef I’m ****in crying over here!!!
Unfortunate.Since we're all family here, I'll share this story......
So I bought a cherry work car for 3k Monday night. Previous to picking it up at 6, i had a bit of tuna salad. It must have hit my post workout drink and didn't agree, I shit twice. I figured I'd have a window to go down the road and get it and make it back in time in the event there was a next round of shit.
Well i got to the guys house and the cramps started. I noticed he still had his plates on as he is counting the money. At this point the cold sweats started and I grabbed the screwdriver and said " I'll get the plates off while youre counting the money".
Now as I do this, I was in between contractions so I thought all is going to be ok. He handed me the keys and asked if I had any questions. Now the gut started rumbling again, I knew I was on borrowed time. The car was literally a mile from my house, so not very far.
There i am, driving home, half way home and I realize shit is getting real, i even rolled through two stop signs. The minute I hit my street, the ole bunghole can't hold any more so it begins to seep. Its at this point I lift off the seat for fear of soiling this new (to me) car. Well, it began to come out.
I come to a screeching stop once I got home, got out and ran to the bathroom, all the while I can feel this load in my pants as baby's with a full diaper would feel. I sat down on the crapper and the rest is history. The happy ending to this story is that there was no shit on my car seat.
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Thanks Hef. That made me actually laugh! And I don't laugh at much. I hope the rest of your week is uneventful. That was some funny shit because we've all been there at some point. Bravo.Hahahaha, no idea, was more worried what my shorts looked like ........unfortunately I know
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Bad grandpa.......the best!!!