Why parents drink.

9cobra4

Chickennoodlesoup.
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A Mother passing by her son's bedroom was astonished to see that his bed was nicely made and everything was picked up.
Then she saw an envelop,propped up prominently on the pillow that was addressed to "Mom".With the worst premonition she opened the envelop with trembling hands and read the letter.
Dear Mom,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you.I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Dad and you.I have been finding real passion with Stacy and she is so nice.But I know you would not approve of her because of all her piercings,tattoos,tight motorcycle clothes and the fact that she is much older than I am.But it's not only the passion.....
Mom,she is pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy.She owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter.We share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone.We'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy.In the meantime we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Stacy can get better.She deserves it.Don't worry Mom.I'm 15 and I know how to take care of myself.Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren.

Love,
Your Son,Paul

P.S. Mom,none of the above is true.I'm over at Dustin's house.I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than the report card that's in my center desk drawer.
I love you-call me when it's safe to come home!


Stole this from another mustang site, thought it was pretty funny.
 

slider701

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I always likes this one.............................

Why parents drink

The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialed the employee’s home phone number and was greeted with a child’s whisper. ” Hello ? “

“Is your daddy home?” he asked.

” Yes ,” whispered the small voice. May I talk with him?”

The child whispered, ” No .”

Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, “Is your Mommy there?” ” Yes .”

“May I talk with her?” Again the small voice whispered, ” No .”

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, “Is anybody else there?”

” Yes ,” whispered the child, ” a policeman ”.

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee’s home, the boss asked, “May I speak with the policeman?”

” No, he’s busy ”, whispered the child.

“Busy doing what?”

” Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman ,” came the whispered answer.

Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, “What is that noise?”

” A helicopter ” answered the whispering voice.

“What is going on there?!” demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.

Again, whispering, the child answered, ” The search team just landed a helicopter .”

Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, “What are they searching for?”

Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle…

” ME .”
 

SIr RicCuS

Orange County Horsepower
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South Orange County, CA
I always likes this one.............................

Why parents drink

The boss wondered why one of his most valued employees had not phoned in sick one day. Having an urgent problem with one of the main computers, he dialed the employee’s home phone number and was greeted with a child’s whisper. ” Hello ? “

“Is your daddy home?” he asked.

” Yes ,” whispered the small voice. May I talk with him?”

The child whispered, ” No .”

Surprised and wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, “Is your Mommy there?” ” Yes .”

“May I talk with her?” Again the small voice whispered, ” No .”

Hoping there was somebody with whom he could leave a message, the boss asked, “Is anybody else there?”

” Yes ,” whispered the child, ” a policeman ”.

Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee’s home, the boss asked, “May I speak with the policeman?”

” No, he’s busy ”, whispered the child.

“Busy doing what?”

” Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman ,” came the whispered answer.

Growing more worried as he heard a loud noise in the background through the earpiece on the phone, the boss asked, “What is that noise?”

” A helicopter ” answered the whispering voice.

“What is going on there?!” demanded the boss, now truly apprehensive.

Again, whispering, the child answered, ” The search team just landed a helicopter .”

Alarmed, concerned and a little frustrated the boss asked, “What are they searching for?”

Still whispering, the young voice replied with a muffled giggle…

” ME .”

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

That story made me ROFL so hard I almost crapped myself! My little brother and I did something similar when we were 3 and 4. :-D
 

JMoraru

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:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

That story made me ROFL so hard I almost crapped myself! My little brother and I did something similar when we were 3 and 4. :-D

My friend's brother did the same thing. I do not now how, but he managed to fall asleep under his bed. They went around the house calling his name and nothing. Searched(well, except under the bed of course) and couldn't find him. They panicked when they couldnt find him and his shoes were still there. Called the cops and we were about to go search the neighborhood when the little booger finally got up:lol1:
 

sunburned

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I wish I would have thought of that letter as a kid. Parents were way too overprotective (and still are at 23...).
 

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