The sailor, the captain, and the barrel.

[olympic]

Once, there was a sailor. The captain welcomed him aboard as a new crew member.

The Sailor was just settling in when he notice that there were no female sailors. He was a hardy young man whole needed his fill of beer, bacon, and most of all: women. So the sailor went to the captain and asked him, "Captain, there are no women aboard, and i am a man who needs lots of women, how do solve this problem?"

The captain says, "There are other men aboard and they have the same concerns as you, lad. I too find it hard to be away from me wife. There hasn't been a women aboard in years, but we have found a solution to this problem. Follow me."

So the sailor follows the captain to the hold, and the captain leads the sailor to an inconspicuous barrel with a hole thats just the right size and just about the right hight. The captain says, "well, Lad, here tis our solution, just stick it in ye hole and have away."

The sailor looks incredulously at the captain. "Are you serious?!? A hole in a barrel?!?" "Just try it" and the captain walks away.

The sailor thinks that there could be no harm in trying and undoes his pants.

Fifteen minutes later the sailor climbs on deck with a huge smile. "Wow, captain, that was amazing! I have bedded many women in my day and that barrel was better than most by far." The captain replies, "Aye, thought you would like it. Feel free to use it any time, day or night.... except Tuesdays that is."

The sailor looks at the captain with a confused expression. "Why not Tuesdays?"

"Because Tuesdays are your day in the barrel."

 

[03cobra#694]

Hahahahaha

 

[MFE]

So a guy gets stationed with foreign outfit in the desert, and finds himself in a similar situation. No women to be found. After a while, he asks the company commander, what do the guys do for, ah, sexual relations? Commander says "oh, certainly. Fortunately, there's a camel around the back of the supply tent". Dude says awesome, and heads over that way. There's one hell of a ruckus, but after a while, the dude returns to the commander, but now there's a bunch of other soldiers standing there pissing themselves laughing. Dude says thanks to the commander, much appreciated, it was a little awkward at first, but very satisfying in the end. The commander says "that's good to hear, but what the guys do is ride the camel to the oasis over that way, where there are women".

 

[CobraBob]

Those were both funny!

 

[me32]

Hahahaha both good ones.

 

[wundrbird]

So a guy gets stationed with foreign outfit in the desert, and finds himself in a similar situation. No women to be found. After a while, he asks the company commander, what do the guys do for, ah, sexual relations? Commander says "oh, certainly. Fortunately, there's a camel around the back of the supply tent". Dude says awesome, and heads over that way. There's one hell of a ruckus, but after a while, the dude returns to the commander, but now there's a bunch of other soldiers standing there pissing themselves laughing. Dude says thanks to the commander, much appreciated, it was a little awkward at first, but very satisfying in the end. The commander says "that's good to hear, but what the guys do is ride the camel to the oasis over that way, where there are women".

John Boy and Billy, two guys with a radio show in the southeast, ran this joke as a skit on the air with Bill Clinton visiting a Middle East air base looking for some "entertainment". The sound effects had me in tears.

 

[MDShelby]

Lol's!!