Thinking about life as you get older?

rborden

Well-Known Member
Established Member
Joined
Feb 18, 2014
Messages
1,656
Location
USA
If you’re financially secure enough to be out if work for 3-6 months until you find something else, yes you made the right move.

If not, things could get tight for a bit. Ways easier to find a job when you have one as opposed to when you don’t.
 

Great Asp

Well-Known Member
Established Member
Premium Member
Joined
Mar 17, 2007
Messages
4,218
Location
St. Louis
Sounds like you made a good choice, and I wish you the best of luck finding something that you like to do, and pays you the way you want to be paid.

I developed a small family owed business for over 24 years. Thought that I would retire there, but the husband and wife passed away and the son became owner. He cut my pay (commissions) in half. I quit and started my own company doing very much the same thing. The funny thing is, I take business from my old company, but all they can do is keep the business they would have gotten anyway LOL.

If you can, I highly recommend starting your own business. Then you won't mind when you decided that you need to work doubles, because you'll be making 5-10 times the money you made before working for someone else.

Best of luck to you!

E
 

510paesan

New Member
Established Member
Joined
Jul 24, 2017
Messages
17
It’s called “over time”
Not “over worked”
Work to live not live to work man


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

Kevins89notch

Well-Known Member
Established Member
Joined
Jun 12, 2005
Messages
6,651
Location
Central Florida

Cheap travel? Follow travel blogs/pages have a schedule that allows you to go anytime you want and stay in youth hostels. Hawaii flight is free because SW messed up my flight earlier this year, hostel is $40 a night x 8 = $320. They do day trip, plus the island has a decent bus system, so I'm not getting a car. Hell, it would probably be like $600, but I'm doing an expensive all inclusive day trip to a resort/park where they filmed Jurassic Park, that's like $2XX.
 

jaxbusa

Well-Known Member
Established Member
Joined
Sep 29, 2015
Messages
688
Location
Northeast Florida
I’m glad you posted this. I stopped working overtime about two years ago. When I worked a lot of overtime I noticed that I ate unhealthy food and my sleep suffered. I would spend my off days catching up on sleep. I’ve been to a few funerals for people I worked with that died two or three years in retirement. The best investment you can make is your happiness and health.

I work with a guy that bought too big of a house, had a $50,000 pool put in and just bought a 60,000 boat. He works overtime all the time and has two kids. I can’t help but think about all of the time he’s missing with his kids. Good luck.


Sent from my iPhone using svtperformance.com
 

quad

Well-Known Member
Established Member
Joined
Jun 1, 2004
Messages
8,073
Location
Detroit
Sounds like you made a good choice, and I wish you the best of luck finding something that you like to do, and pays you the way you want to be paid.

I developed a small family owed business for over 24 years. Thought that I would retire there, but the husband and wife passed away and the son became owner. He cut my pay (commissions) in half. I quit and started my own company doing very much the same thing. The funny thing is, I take business from my old company, but all they can do is keep the business they would have gotten anyway LOL.

If you can, I highly recommend starting your own business. Then you won't mind when you decided that you need to work doubles, because you'll be making 5-10 times the money you made before working for someone else.

Best of luck to you!

E
I've heard this story before. My father-in law mentioned working for a company with a similar scenario. The owner of the business was great to work for, workers liked him etc. Decided to retire, passed the torch to the son. He reduced many of the workers pay or let them go. Then tried to hire them back at lower rates. He tried this with my father-in law who had lots of options and told the guy to take a hike. One of the managers left and all the disgruntled workers left to work with him instead. The son basically ran the business into the ground.
 

SolarYellow

Sensei
Established Member
Premium Member
Joined
Jun 11, 2005
Messages
9,584
Location
Scranton, PA
To the people that are actually going to read and respond today, I told my boss to go **** himself after 2.5 years at a company I work for and having 4 bosses within that time frame.

Previous to my past I worked for a company for over 13+ years, did great but was acquired and asked to move which I couldn't do being that I take care of my grandmother with stage 2 breast cancer and my parents because my stepfather shakes with a hammer in his hand.

I finally hit my breaking point when I was asked to work another double shift for the 20th time (international company) on the 2nd and 3rd shift without a day off aside for the 4th and I threw a shit fit and said no. The Compensation is no longer worth, I have saved 9 months to hold out but do you think I made the right decision?

I talked to an internal friend's company who I did 5 interviews for but got denied because of the exception of pay, did I make the right decision or butt **** myself?

cliff2.jpg


Hope your mother recovered.
 

ViciousJay

Well-Known Member
Established Member
Joined
Nov 22, 2004
Messages
20,266
Location
Chi Burbs
View attachment 1586447

Hope your mother recovered.
Grandmother and she's doing ok but she's 88 and living alone and I've tried talking to her into moving in with me because I have a 5 bedroom house in which I would move my office upstairs and give her easy access on the first floor and bathroom and use a baby monitor in case she needed anything while I'm sleeping.
 

GM Nitemare

Active Member
Established Member
Joined
Nov 12, 2009
Messages
671
Location
Nowhere Special.
Family comes first. I think you did the right thing. My wife and I split in Dec 98. Jan 2000, I started working part time(age 37) so I could spend as much time with my 2 boys as possible. Took a hit on my pay, but worth every lost penny.
 

ViciousJay

Well-Known Member
Established Member
Joined
Nov 22, 2004
Messages
20,266
Location
Chi Burbs
Family comes first. I think you did the right thing. My wife and I split in Dec 98. Jan 2000, I started working part time(age 37) so I could spend as much time with my 2 boys as possible. Took a hit on my pay, but worth every lost penny.
 

SolarYellow

Sensei
Established Member
Premium Member
Joined
Jun 11, 2005
Messages
9,584
Location
Scranton, PA
Grandmother and she's doing ok but she's 88 and living alone and I've tried talking to her into moving in with me because I have a 5 bedroom house in which I would move my office upstairs and give her easy access on the first floor and bathroom and use a baby monitor in case she needed anything while I'm sleeping.

That's good to hear. All my best Jay. Don't underestimate how difficult it can be to watch or take care of an elderly person. It's like job number two. We recently put my grandfather away (thank god) and my grandmother still lives in her house but I can tell you seeing them for only a few hours a week and I'm ready to jump in front of a moving car afterwards. You go from having your own life and responsibilities to adding even more on your shoulders. One day you have to stop in and check on your crazy grandfather and two other days you are at grandmother's house making sure she is fine and keeping up the house.
 

xblitzkriegx

Well-Known Member
Established Member
Joined
May 24, 2010
Messages
1,410
Location
Earth
No, it's not sad. Real men provide for their families no matter the personal cost.

Sent using the svtperformance.com mobile app

I believe his point is that providing for your family goes beyond the amount of numbers on a paycheck.

Those numbers can't teach your son how to throw a football not can they teach your daughter how to tell a good man from an abusive one before it starts.

That paycheck doesn't pay for the once chance you have to see your kid smile when they learn how to ride a bike, the moment when they achieve something for themselves and they look to you with the smile of their accomplishment. They see you, not anyone else.

Making money is obviously important, no one denies that. At some point, the trade off between family time and money has to reach a tipping point.
 
Last edited:

CobraBob

Authorized Vendor
Established Member
Premium Member
Single Barrel Sirs
Joined
Nov 17, 2002
Messages
105,349
Location
Cheshire, CT
I don't think you read between the lines. Money doesn't buy happiness. One family can drop 10K on a drip to Disney while the kids complain the whole time, while another does a camping/fishing/hiking trip in TN for 2K and the kids leave their cell phones at home. A gucci bag for your wife doesn't make you a better husband. Having a load 2019 Raptor doesn't get you to work a whole lot different than a 2005 F150.

What's sad is a father working 80 hours a week for that Disney/Gucci/Raptor lifestyle and not seeing his family. You can have a family in TN living on 50K a year that's twice as happy as a family in TX living on 200K a year.
You're a wise man, Kevin! I'm totally with you on your priorities.
 

BlckBox04

I am the liquor
Established Member
Premium Member
Joined
Dec 24, 2007
Messages
8,496
Location
NJ
The older I get the more I realize that my happiness is becoming more important to me than my wealth. I literally wake up every morning dreading coming to work, and my boss is my father, which makes it harder for me to find the right answer of my position.

OP what's that old saying, you can't take it all with you when you're in the ground? Regret is probably one of the most difficult aspects to deal with in life. There is no right or wrong answer. If you have the money to hold you over I don't think you should look back.

Just my .02
 

IA Shelby

Well-Known Member
Established Member
Joined
Mar 24, 2011
Messages
3,567
Location
Iowa
Most of the replies seem to imply this happiness decision is a binary switch. Kill it financially and have family time suffer or be all in on the family and accept the financial downside.

I don’t believe this to be true in many situations. I have been fortunate to do well in my career that has required significant investment of time. I also spend a great deal of time with my family. I do agree that time is finite and choices need to be made which is why I have dropped many of my hobbies that I used to get involved in. I don’t play golf anymore because that takes 6 hrs away from the family on the weekends.

The other thing is we all have different situations. I have two children with special needs. I needed to make a strong income to allow my wife to be able to stay home with them. I also need to make sure we have considerable wealth accumulated so that after my wife and I die, there will be substantial funds to take care of them for the rest of their lives. I am doing the best job I can to balance all of the family needs and I don’t feel guilty about it. I have personally sacrificed many of the fun things I used to like to do. That is the way it should be. Responsibility as a father to take care of your family trumps personal wants and desires. I get up early in the AM when they are sleeping to get a start on the day and try to be home by 6-6:30. Spend the rest of the night with them. Do I miss out on watching “The walking dead” - yep. Do I care - nope!

My wife and I still allow for some fun expenditures. Travel, cars, etc... That is to keep us sane as well. You can’t help others if you are in a bad spot as well.

To all the family members trying to make it work, my hats off to you. Everybody’s situation is a bit different.

To the OP - you have made your decision. Now go make the most of it and don’t look back. Never question it and you will likely find the balance that you need.
 

earico

It's 4:20 somewhere...
Established Member
Joined
Jan 13, 2011
Messages
5,168
Location
SA TX
Asking if you have made the right decision really doesn't matter at this point. It's already done. So focus on the now what.

I've been self employed since 2005 and it was the best decision I've ever made work wise. However some don't have the discipline to do that or can't handle not having a guaranteed weekly paycheck.
 

IronSnake

Beers for the boys
Established Member
Joined
Aug 30, 2006
Messages
4,337
Location
South Carolina
Stress is a killer.

I decided that the big expensive truck I have, and all of the bills and stuff aren't worth it. So wife and I are in paying off mode and selling whatever has a note on it, even if it's a loss, just to get rid of the overhead and move on.

I want to be that person at 62-65 with no house payment and a good retirement to coast on. Work on the side and enjoy grandkids and family and traveling. I'm 29 now, so I hope I make it that long. But I'd rather live simply than live stress-fully
 

Users who are viewing this thread



Top