Living on low income - accepting the "poor" life.

Thanks for the replies. They are a lot more positive than I thought I was going to get. Thanks for sharing your paths in life - it is very interesting. I wasn't trying to make this personal, but it is probably necessary since I'm asking for ideas and perspectives:

I'm a bit behind in life. Started off well in college: 3.8/math. Something happened and I lost confidence in myself/anxiety/depression. Dropped in and out. I'm about ~40 credits short of finishing (3 semesters). Worked maintenance at a hotel (Man, maybe I should go back...). Drinking. Psychiatrist. "Lost" 10 years of my life. I'm finally getting it figured out again at 33. Well, figured out is being kind. Waking up on time, going to work, and trying to do a good job. Honestly, I can't believe I've made it 3 months. As pathetic as it is, it's been a big change for me. I mentioned in my first post that I have had a privileged life - I couldn't ask for more growing up. It scares me when I compare what kind of life I had growing up to what my future life is going to look like.

"You never work a day in your life if you love what you do." Some variation of that statement is all over. There has to be some truth behind it but I have yet to feel it. How would you go about finding something that you would enjoy? Isn't that the million dollar question. Using the trades as an example, what would be the best way to get a feel for them - HVAC/Electric/Plumbing? Community college? Try to contact some companies for job shadow (have tried in the past with no avail). I have even tried to contact companies that are hiring and haven't gotten a response - not looking for a job, just looking to check things out. I'm not sure where to go from here.

"Money cannot buy happiness." I was trying to get at this idea in my first post but I didn't word it right. This is one I really struggle with. I'm sure it is in conjunction with the the statement above. Since I haven't found anything that I'm really drawn to, I have focused more on jobs with higher potential income so that I can do the things that I'd like to do. To the point that I would not even consider a career field if it didn't pay a certain level. Obviously, this hasn't worked for me. I guess I'm having trouble looking for a comfortable spot. Some of you have mentioned that you are happy, or at least seem content, with your current lifestyles. How did you know when you got there? You had to work your way up to your current spot - what made you "stop" there? What kept you from working to that next level?

What I would do for someone to tell me, "Hey, you'll be pretty happy doing ______." Not even happy, I'd be satisfied with content.

velocicaur said:

Thanks for the replies. They are a lot more positive than I thought I was going to get. Thanks for sharing your paths in life - it is very interesting. I wasn't trying to make this personal, but it is probably necessary since I'm asking for ideas and perspectives:

I'm a bit behind in life. Started off well in college: 3.8/math. Something happened and I lost confidence in myself/anxiety/depression. Dropped in and out. I'm about ~40 credits short of finishing (3 semesters). Worked maintenance at a hotel (Man, maybe I should go back...). Drinking. Psychiatrist. "Lost" 10 years of my life. I'm finally getting it figured out again at 33. Well, figured out is being kind. Waking up on time, going to work, and trying to do a good job. Honestly, I can't believe I've made it 3 months. As pathetic as it is, it's been a big change for me. I mentioned in my first post that I have had a privileged life - I couldn't ask for more growing up. It scares me when I compare what kind of life I had growing up to what my future life is going to look like.

"You never work a day in your life if you love what you do." Some variation of that statement is all over. There has to be some truth behind it but I have yet to feel it. How would you go about finding something that you would enjoy? Isn't that the million dollar question. Using the trades as an example, what would be the best way to get a feel for them - HVAC/Electric/Plumbing? Community college? Try to contact some companies for job shadow (have tried in the past with no avail). I have even tried to contact companies that are hiring and haven't gotten a response - not looking for a job, just looking to check things out. I'm not sure where to go from here.

"Money cannot buy happiness." I was trying to get at this idea in my first post but I didn't word it right. This is one I really struggle with. I'm sure it is in conjunction with the the statement above. Since I haven't found anything that I'm really drawn to, I have focused more on jobs with higher potential income so that I can do the things that I'd like to do. To the point that I would not even consider a career field if it didn't pay a certain level. Obviously, this hasn't worked for me. I guess I'm having trouble looking for a comfortable spot. Some of you have mentioned that you are happy, or at least seem content, with your current lifestyles. How did you know when you got there? You had to work your way up to your current spot - what made you "stop" there? What kept you from working to that next level?

What I would do for someone to tell me, "Hey, you'll be pretty happy doing ______." Not even happy, I'd be satisfied with content.

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I don’t consider myself “content” at all. This is a stopping point so I can get back to school. When I finish school get in the Field I’m going towards I will be happy. Keep the hobby of building cars with my spare funds.
My dream is to open a shop doing the crazy builds I plan out. Hopefully the cobra and the build I have planned to do will help keep me interested in the job I have. I know if people see what I can do and what I can build with all my experience from being “broke”. I spend every extra moment I have building and designing stuff I never stop learning.
I understand OP it can be hard to find your “cadence” and stay in your lane. I was bad to the point I quit five jobs in a row without giving them three days to see how it was. I work in just simple warehousing but I know it isn’t where I will be forever and I have the will to get out of it.

Nope. Money can't buy happiness. But, it can make life easier. Regardless of income, you have to be a good steward of your money. I suggest figuring out what you like/want to do. Once you find the direction you need to go, you find employment doing what you like/want. Once there, then you figure out how to earn the income you want. Chasing money for the sake of money is a waste of life.

No one can tell "you" what you would be happy doing. Decide for yourself and live your own life.

It’s true. Money can’t buy happiness. The most happy I’ve ever been was when I recovered from a serious medical issue. Get real sick once and your perspective and priorities change quickly.

Op, if you have to take on a second job like waiting tables or something to help you get where you wanna be, then that’s an option. It could help you pay for schooling in a community college to get some credits.
Places like UPS/FedEx etc that are large companies offer benefits and room for advancement. You’re not going to be where you want to be unless you make drastic changes. Good luck man

01Jes said:

Learn a good trade, machining, welding, operator or maybe a co-op partnership with college/entry level program. Takes a ton of persistence and hard work to get your foot in the door. 15yrs I was super hungry to find a career and I was 21. I was knocked down several times. You gotta keep trucking man. Find a lucrative trade you like and pursue it. How old are you?

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This.

I can definitely relate. When you have to scrounge for change under your car seat to pay for $1.37 in gas to get home, or stretch a Subway sandwich 2 meals, you know things suck. Thankfully I'm not there anymore, but the source of stress evolved.

The short answer is, you have to pursue your passion. If you work to work, you'll never get ahead. Passion is what will drive you to bigger and greater things. In fact, passion in a job that pays less is more rewarding than despising a job that pays well.

In my situation, I was too passionate about my career and got myself into trouble trying to play hero. I've since learned that a work/life balance is extremely important, but I'm still passionate about what I do.

When I interview someone, qualifications fall second to passion. If someone shows genuine interest and enthusiasm, I know they will be driven to learn and develop on the job. If someone has all of the qualifications but is apathetic, they're not right for the position.

Nothing wrong with getting a late start, it only matters how you finish.

I think few are lucky to have a job they love. I also live in the Grand Rapids area as the OP and I can tell you there are plenty of jobs in the area where you can make more money then what you are making. I work at Steelcase and they are hiring off the street right now (no temp service) because we can't find people. Also Amazon's new warehouse is being built which will employ 1,000+ jobs starting at $14-$15

Am I saying you will be happy with that, maybe not but there are plenty of places to make more money

Also there are plenty of engineering jobs out there if you could get a degree. That is what I would have done knowing what I know now. I'm just a high school grad and have been with Steelcase for 24 years. My girlfriend (she works there too) and I are on a second set of new cars in 5 years so we must be doing alright

velocicaur said:

There have been multiple studies that say the number to reach is ~75k in terms of happiness. Anything below that and you are yearning for more. Anything more than that really doesn't add much to life. Agree? Disagree?

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I don't think there's a set number. It depends too much on what you want in your life. If I only made $75k I'd be miserable as I would not be able to give my wife and kids the life and toys they deserve.

Outlaw99 said:

I am the complete opposite. I do not have the lust to chase paychecks. I live simple. I dont have nice stuff anymore. Simply have zero interest in being flashy with expensive things. I wake up, do what i love doing. Work for myself and life is awesome.

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You, Sir, are my hero. I want to be this way if I can secure anything that resembles a livable retirement. Now, if I can just get my wife onboard.


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Join the military or take out student loans or persuade someone to teach you a trade. Nothing worth achieving is ever easily achieved.

I love reading these kinda threads. Im 28 and feel like I can relate to most of you.

HS was a breeze, graduated in 2008. Didn't really have to apply myself to get good grades. Never had a thought of what I wanted to do after it. Graduated and started at a local community college taking the basic classes, still un-sure of what I wanted. My mom suggested Engineering but I never really knew what an engineer did. The only jobs I knew of where working retail at a store. I had a hard time trying to pick a field since I didn't know what kind of jobs were out there. This was all while working at a Meijer (like a Walmart).

Fast forward 3 years, I wasn't applying myself in CC and dropped some classes. All I cared about was my new-to-me Mustang I had bought (financed) and modding it. My friend got me a new job working for a Metrology company as shop help for $10 an hour, at the age of 21. Once I showed them I was competent, they eventually had me retrofitting old CMMs, setting up new ones, traveling here and there, etc. Pay raises along the way. I stopped going to CC in the meantime.

Im still at the same company in 2018. Im in a new role here, which involves running the CT (computed tomography, x-ray) services lab and while Ive had struggles with what I really want out of life and if this field is the correct one for me, I still haven't left. The pay is good for only having my associates (I did go back and finish that for myself), close to $60k year, commission on certain sales in my department, benefits, 3 weeks vacay. Of course, I would like to make more, but that will most likely only happen with a company change or when I become the supervisor to this department.

I get to work with cool things most days, some days im bored out of my mind with not much to do. I think about if I made the right choice or if I should have not cared about my car as much, saved more money, and focused on college or if I had someone to push me in a direction, where would I be now. I know how to fix cars like its nothing now and I do like having that skill.

I have regrets that I didn't get my bachelors degree. Who knows where I couldnt have been now. But you know what, I have zero student loan debt, a decent sized 401k, started an IRA last year, no car loans or CC debt, enough in savings to get me by for close to 3 years, im healthy, eat good, and I can deadlift 405 on a good day. I really don't have much to complain about.

All-in-all, I think life is what you make of it. Money isn't shit, but it is nice to have enough to not stress about the little things. Find some sort of trade and show them that you are willing to learn and work your ass off. It'll all work out in the end.

I often wonder how much of staying in lower income is a choice. I'm understand everyone has different circumstances but in general there are plenty of great paying jobs here in KY.

For instance I am doing an engineering CO-OP at North American stainless in Ghent, KY. There are currently 70+ operator positions open, most of which do not require any experience.

Full benefits, up to 5 weeks vacation, etc. Some of the operators here have made almost 80-100k a year working all holidays and tons of overtime.
The parking lots are full of 60k + trucks. People are leaving this job for better paying steel mill jobs believe it or not.

If you want to get promoted into maintenance they will pay for your school and for the time you're in class you get paid your hourly rate. Most of the maintenance guys make around 70k.

Personally I started as a temporary on an assembly line making $8 an hour. Got promoted into fabrication making around $12/hour. The cost of living there was nothing. Lived comfortably (single, no kids) but decided I really wanted to get a degree in engineering. Been in school ever since and about to graduate.

Getting my degree has been the hardest thing I've ever done. These last two semesters will make 6 years. Will i be rich? No but I will enjoy what I do for the rest of my life and have many different jobs to choose from.


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Get into a skilled trade. I’m starting green apprentices at 20. You can get your journeyman’s electrical license in mass in 5 years. If you show up consistently and be halfway decent you’ll be making 60-70k pretty easily.


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I love y'all SVTp homies. But some of your replies are dissertations lol.

I'll make mine simple. 18 years old I said I'm not going to college. Started full time at a dealership. By 20 I was making about 40-45k. A friend convinced me to give college a try so I started at community college. Got the General Ed's out of the way. Transferred to a great four year institution, got my bachelors in 3, beat the bushes locally and found someone to hire me out of college.

I bounced around and developed my skills as a technician while searching for a full time career. Couple years later and a few failed careers, I became a service adviser at Ford to pay the bills and started making 80-90k. Except I was miserable.

Two months later, I get a call from the company i'm with now. I was referred by someone who knew me thru the dealership. I took a pay cut, but the hours and benefits are tremendously better. And this is truly a "Career". I've been here for 2 years and can say it's the best decision I've made. Other than my wife.

Not to mention, while all of the hot mess turmoil, failed jobs, failed careers, failed aspirations were going on, I continued to push myself as a tech/mechanic. Now I make killer side money while drinking beer in the garage.

It's all in how you spin things man. The last thing I'd expect four years ago when I graduated was I'd be where I am, getting married, having a house, being so well known locally as a good wrench, and just everything. If you push yourself, you can pretty much do anything.

I can relate. Knew I didn't want to go to college. So went to UTI instead cause I loved working on cars. Realized working on cars full time sucked balls and pay sucks. So, went to the service advisor side of things. I make OK money. I'm getting boned with how much I sell. But, hopefully soon will be going to a place where I should easily make 85K or more. I didn't really care for this job and it can still suck huge asshole at times but I am starting to like the challenge of selling services and making people happy. And the few awful customers I get that make me want to quit my job is outweighed by the customers that make me like it. Just today I got tipped $20 for literally nothing. I also agree with other people in that you need to find what you enjoy and try and make a living out of it. It makes life a lot more bearable.

IronSnake said:

I love y'all SVTp homies. But some of your replies are dissertations lol.

I'll make mine simple. 18 years old I said I'm not going to college. Started full time at a dealership. By 20 I was making about 40-45k. A friend convinced me to give college a try so I started at community college. Got the General Ed's out of the way. Transferred to a great four year institution, got my bachelors in 3, beat the bushes locally and found someone to hire me out of college.

I bounced around and developed my skills as a technician while searching for a full time career. Couple years later and a few failed careers, I became a service adviser at Ford to pay the bills and started making 80-90k. Except I was miserable.

Two months later, I get a call from the company i'm with now. I was referred by someone who knew me thru the dealership. I took a pay cut, but the hours and benefits are tremendously better. And this is truly a "Career". I've been here for 2 years and can say it's the best decision I've made. Other than my wife.

Not to mention, while all of the hot mess turmoil, failed jobs, failed careers, failed aspirations were going on, I continued to push myself as a tech/mechanic. Now I make killer side money while drinking beer in the garage.

It's all in how you spin things man. The last thing I'd expect four years ago when I graduated was I'd be where I am, getting married, having a house, being so well known locally as a good wrench, and just everything. If you push yourself, you can pretty much do anything.

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Are you a writer or a tech?

Mpoitrast87 said:

Are you a writer or a tech?

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I'm a Tech that was a writer. lol.

I know it's not common, but more often then not I was instructing my techs how to fix things or Diag'ing in the lane. I know that's a big no-no, but it was a good way to make myself money and them too. Hence why the first month I was there I made 7g. We turned and burned work. I was selected for the BMW apprenticeship program at 20 but turned it down to get my Bachelors.

From about 17 to now I've been doing side work. Whether it's building engines, rear ends, transmissions, electrical gremlins, chassis work, suspension, anything, I've done it. Built a lot of cars for folks and so my tech skills have only multiplied. Last night I tore an IRS out of an 03/04 to FTBR it for a friend and build his diff. I have another 03/04 diff sitting on the bench now for someone else.

To say I supplement my income is a stretch. It's practically a second job/income. But it makes me happy.

When I started out I did not have significant amount of disposable income. Today I am fortunate to be financially secure.. While money doesn’t insure happiness it sure does make life much easier IMO. I do not stress about providing for my family or having to limit what we can do. I followed advice given to me a long time ago when I was told, “If your gonna be here, be here.” As others have said, find something you are passionate about and excel at it. Financial security usually follows. If you are not satisfied in your current position and you have the health and ability...do something about it. Best wishes on your future endeavors.